Amanda
Erin
Amanda and Erin were first photographed in the summer of 2020. “In that photograph, it was just us and our dogs, which was not reflective of what our life typically looked like,” said Amanda. “Our son Austin had left to live with his dad and Erin’s dad Larry was in the hospital, then rehab, recovering from a stroke. I think of when you took our photo, we had a lot of love and we were very happy, but we were so alone in a way that we hadn't been alone. Everybody that we were responsible for was out of reach.
“Austin was having some trouble in school, but was college bound. Then the pandemic hit and it just undid everything,” Amanda said. “He stayed with his dad for spring break and then sent us a message saying, “since school is gonna be virtual, I'm not coming back.” He struggled with substance abuse, ultimately having a near fatal fentanyl overdose in December 2020. He went to rehab and was the youngest person there.”
Erin’s dad, Larry, came home in September of 2020 and they were able to continue their intergenerational lifestyle. Additionally, Erin and Amanda took in their three grandchildren after their daughter continued to struggle with her mental health and was exasperated by the pandemic.
“We had to tighten down and make sure not to get people sick. Lots of health and safety to keep in mind with Erin’s dad’s health and having three children in the house.”
Erin and Amanda were working full-time remotely through the majority of 2020 + 2021. Erin changed jobs when her employers were requiring people to come back into the office. “There was a huge push for everyone to come back in the office, which was counter-intuitive considering the next wave of COVID was happening,” Erin said. “It was too risky for my dad’s health, so I went back to consulting while taking care of my dad and I started job hunting. He was always so supportive and would ask how the search was going. The day I got the call that I landed my new job, I was able to tell him. He was so happy for me. That same day, he passed away from complications from his stroke. It meant a lot that I got to share the good news with him before he passed.”
Amanda worked as the Executive Director of Plexus LGBT & Allied Chamber of Commerce for one year when the shut down went into effect. “It changed the entire concept of what our organization was, but it was the best thing that probably could've happened. We always said that we are more than a networking group, but that was all that we really did, and then all of a sudden we couldn't network. We stepped into the space that we knew that we were in around diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging training.”
When asked about the impact the pandemic had on the LGBTQ+ community, Amanda and Erin replied, “Some impact that we know happened was increased isolation, how hard that was, and how it might've prolonged folks coming out, especially younger ones. How it might've kept trans people from being able to access the care that they needed, especially to make their social transition. One thing that became prescient during that time was basically living through a plague. The HIV activists and those continuing to live positively with HIV had the recognition that within the queer community and queer spaces we have many immunocompromised.”
Life throughout 2020-2024 was eventful and scary, but full of love for Erin and Amanda. Their son Austin lives close to them and continues to work hard on his sobriety. All three of their daughters’ children continued to live with them and are thriving. Though Erin’s father passed in 2022, his memory is very much alive. Both women are still working and have started to enjoy a more social calendar since 2023.
“I think society is forever changed,” Amanda said. “There are moments of great intensity where you do not know if you’re going to make it through. Larry, through the stroke, losing him. Austin in rehab. Not knowing where our daughter was. Those were all really intense times. Everything was heightened because of the national tragedy we were all a part of. You really don’t think you’re going to make it through and then you do. I think one of the quotes that always stays with me is: “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” You don’t know what’s on the other side, but you come through one way or another.”
